
Pattern Tracker
Pattern Tracker
Record what happened, notice what keeps repeating, and make decisions based on what happens over time rather than one confusing interaction.
Look for what repeats over time.
You do not need to label or diagnose another person. You can simply notice when the same behaviours keep leaving you confused, excluded, unsupported, less confident or unsafe.
Give yourself a moment to settle
You do not need to feel perfectly calm. You will usually notice patterns more clearly when you are not rushing or already overwhelmed. If you can, make a cup of tea, get comfortable, notice the room around you and take a few slow breaths.
Record what happened as simply as you can. You can come back later if you need more time to think.
What are you noticing?
Your tracker entries are saved privately in this browser so you can return to them later.
No interactions have been recorded yet
Begin with one situation. You can return later and add more entries if you notice similar behaviour happening again.
Total entries saved in this browser.
Behaviours appearing in more than one entry.
Your average reported stress level across your entries.
Whether the recorded impact appears stable or increasing.
What appears to be repeating
Most frequent behaviours
Where the pattern appears
How it affects you
What tends to happen next
Keep observing
Recorded interactions
Words you may hear
We use everyday language first. These are some of the proper terms you may see in books, counselling, workplace support or relationship resources.
Pattern: a behaviour or interaction that happens repeatedly over time.
Hypervigilance: feeling constantly on alert for possible problems, danger or changes in another person's behaviour.
Reciprocity: a relationship where care, effort, support and consideration can move both ways.
Deflection: shifting attention away from the issue being discussed.
Coercive control: an ongoing pattern of behaviour used to dominate, frighten, isolate or restrict another person.
Documentation: keeping factual records such as dates, messages, actions, decisions or outcomes.
Keep your tracker available
Your Pattern Tracker already saves entries privately in this browser. You can also save a dashboard snapshot of the current pattern summary.
Record an interaction
Clear the entire tracker?
This permanently removes all saved entries from this browser. This action cannot be undone.